Purgatory
by CaptainMegan
Summary: Short vingettes about hope, guilt, vengence, honor, regret, heartbreak, and ambition.
1. Hope

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Pirates of the Caribbean.

_A heartbeat. _

A heart beats 9600 times each day, keeping life flowing through the body. With each beat, we are able to function as humans doing our normal daily routine. It's such a natural process that we don't even realize the extraordinary action taking place. We take it for granted always expecting that heartbeat to be there pushing blood through our veins. We expect to feel each beat, but there will come a time when that heartbeat is gone.

Having experienced that moment, I must tell you now that there is no other experience on earth compared to it. When the air leaves our bodies, we expect the suffocating, but we don't expect the agony of realizing time on Earth is through. Of course, we try to prepare ourselves for it as all humans do, but something about living through it makes everything much worse. We want to forestall the final judgement, as if that is really possible. There is now ay to escape, not even when you have the tiniest bit of hope.

Hope is what finally killed me. It landed me in this never-ending purgatory because I was foolish enough to make a deal with the devil, as if I could really best him. Never did he intend to set me free. Never again would I be able to enjoy freedom because of one mistake of unfaithfulness.

An untamable spirit pushes us all to divulge in life's pleasurable open hands. Lust is a hard demon to silence, one we all fight on a daily basis. It creeps into the dark corners of our minds while we are completely unaware, settling into our thoughts creating wild fantasies. Yet, at the same time, we secretly hope will continue. It forces us to dace what we really want, separating the honest from the dishonest. It makes us face who we really are to the point of breaking.

I would never have though of myself as honest or honorable or good, not after the things I've done. Yet, in the end, I proved myself. Redeemed myself becoming the man I had always striven to be. It still amazes me, as I sit here suspended between Heaven and Hell, that the love of one woman could cause so much suffering and so much joy for one man.

_Just one more heartbeat…._


	2. Guilt

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Pirates of the Caribbean.

**A/N: **I probably should've explained this in the first part, but I got a bit excited and posted before I thought about it. These are short vignettes about different characters set after Dead Man's Chest. Each one focuses on a different emotion or quality. I'm not going to come right out and say which character these are about, but I've left hints. I really hope you guys are enjoying it and feel free to leave any comments or helpful criticisms.

**Reviewers: **Thanks so much to **Unikorn **and **hiding-from-reality** for reviewing! You guys rock and thank you so much!

_Another dawn._

Dawn is the most peaceful time of day. Tranquility is breathed by the earth and sky. A peaceful sluggishness settles like dust on every surface. It's beautiful, a waltz of color between the clouds.

There was a period in my life when the dawn was my favorite time of the day. It would speak to me, awakening the far corners of my soul. The spirit of adventure would fill my heart, and I could see the many opportunities waiting ahead out in the sparking Caribbean waters. Now the dawn only brought haunting memories of a dishonest mistake.

A kiss is not a sin. It is the reason for the kiss that becomes sinful. Kisses should be sacred, shared only by a man and a woman deeply in love. Without love, a kiss means nothing.

I never meant to enjoy his kiss. The taste of his lips on mine kindled a fire I had never planed on burning. The heat reached every part of my body spreading a new emotion I had never felt before. It was terrifying because I wanted the emotion so badly. Every part of my body cried out for it. Only the clank of chains saved me from another sin.

Guilt is such an ironic thing. It tugs on our conscience causing a deep regret that weighs down on our hearts. It replays the moment over and over again with perfect accuracy. It pushes us away from everyone, holds us back from everyday life because of the dark little secret held within us.

I have no guilt for his murder. It was the only way. He saved us all by staying behind, locked in chains reminiscent of our first meeting almost symbolizing us both.

The only guilt I feel is for the kiss, death's kiss. It took away my naivety, my innocence. I'm now a woman bound to the cover of darkness to hide my sin. Funny how the purity of love causes so much ugliness.

_If only for the cover of night…._


End file.
